i'm running out of speculoos

hey kids.
i haven't written in a week, and while other bloggers may apologize, 
i don't feel like it.
i don't really care.
and i'm pretty sure you guys don't either.
it's like a game, checking your blog roll every day:
"is she gonna post today? no? maybe? pleaseeee?"
i'm mysterious and unpredictable this way.
it adds to my charm.

but uhh life has been good.
all sorts of good.
i decided to drop my one crazy class, therefore putting me at an easy peasy 12 credits this semester, plus the internship and all those jobs.
i decided i don't want to graduate in december.
i like being a college kid.
 it's fun here, it's easy here, and i'll be able spend more time with and then graduate with the friends that i've grown with over the past few years. 
i'll have one more semester of carefree fun and then real life will come soon enough. 
plus i'll get to take all those classes that have always sounded fun, but i never had time for. 
like ceramics? i'll take it.

also. three weeks, three weeks, threeeeee weeks!
the latest b will come home is 3 weeks from today.
[there's already a back-up plan in place to hold the person in charge hostage in case they've lied yet again and my man's not back in my arms by the 19th. don't worry]
i made a paper countdown chain and everything.
you know, those kind you make in preschool where you take a ring off every night before bed to count down until santa comes?
one of those.
21 little rings left, kids.

my sister came and spent the weekend.
that was fun.
disclaimer #1: my younger step-sister came one night too, but we didn't take any awesome pictures together, so she's left out in this little posty post.
disclaimer #2: no good pictures were taken of me and jessa either, so this is 3 weeks old. sue me.

and also. i got some links for you.
internet links, not sausage links.
[sorry, boys]
if you want to read something politically provoking, there's this. 
which i think is genius.
and if you want to read something genius in another way, there's this.
which is beautifully written and so true.

that's all for now.
i hope you all are having a good rainy day and listening to lots of Ray Lamontagne, Bon Iver and Mumford and Sons, like i am.
that's the only music to accompany this kind of day.

p.s.- that title up there?
it's true.
my speculoo stash is almost gone.
i'm not sure what to do next...

taking it for granted

from here

"how terribly sad it was that people were made in such a way that they get used to something as extraordinary as living."
-jostein gaarder

i've been missing b a lot these past few days.
the stress of balancing 16 credits + an internship + 4 jobs + a social life is starting to set in, and one more month without him is just less than ideal.
a month just seems so far away.
i know it's better than the 4 months we've already accomplished, but right now, 4 weeks is just looming over my head.

but in this state of constantly looking ahead, i'm missing out on now.
sure, i see the pretty trees starting to change, and i feel the crisp air on my face the moment i walk out the door in the morning, but i'm not really drinking it in.
i'm wishing my days away.
i don't want to be that person that stops admiring the beauty and stops being thankful for every moment; i don't want to get used to living.
this is my reminder to myself to get out there and live.
whether my best friend is by my side or not, i need to live.
this last month alone will be the best month yet.
i'm going to soak up every last drop of my wonderful life.

p.s- credit where credit is due: these thoughts were inspired by something here and i found that quote here


tonight is, in fact, friday night.
i had plans to be social and then i fell asleep watching a movie at 6:30, so those went out the window obviously.
just a little 4 hour nap, no biggie.
and now i'm in the mood to join in the fun and share about my awkward and awesome week, [inspired by this hilarious lady], even though it's obviously not thursday anymore...
[insert random segway photo of my family at my mom's celebration dinner the other night. smart lady graduating with another Master's degree :)]

- walking home from class the other day and deciding to skip the sidewalk to just cut across the grass. i forgot to step up onto the grass, tripped and fell face first into the wet grass. and by face first i mean i had mud on the side of my face... and my arm and my leg and my whole left side. and i was alone so there wasn't even anyone cool nearby to laugh it off with. just a bunch of mean girls who cracked up and kept walking. 
- windy day. poofy skirt. arms full. i bet you can guess where this one's going.  i walked out of the building and my skirt flew up over my face, exposing my awesome undies and even awesomer bathing suit tan lines to everyone walking by. it was only like 5 people, but that's 5 more people than i was planning on showing my butt to that day.
-running with the hood up on my XL sweatshirt the other night and having my friend tell me i look like Eminem. i actually wasn't planning on hiding a gun under this thing, but now that you mention it...
-having a animated rat named Sniffy on my computer that i have to do experiments with for a psych class. he just sits on my screen and sniffs around. umm, what?
-wearing a classy [thrifted] Pretty Lady-esque dress to said celebration dinner last night and having my brother's girlfriend say "you look like a woman!". oh, as compared to all the other times when i usually look like a man?
-aforementioned extended nap and sleeping right through everyone's text messages asking where i am. my crazy busy weeks have turned me into a grandma.

-mom graduating from grad school! you go girl. and also, the resulting celebratory dinner at which i was reminded how much i love my family.
-getting to skype with benny two whole times this week. la la la, i love him :)
-i've discovered that if i put raspberries and grapes in the same containers, shake them on up, and leave them for a few hours, i'll come back to grapes that taste like raspberries. graspberries?
-my roommate and i love The Office, but somehow i've gone from season 4 to present-day episodes, so we're having a marathon to catch up before the season starts again. too much michael scott? never.
-running [almost] every night with my good friend, chelsea. b comes home in a month and chel and i both have some important things coming up this summer... we gotta get our skinny on!
-b secretly buying me some gifts and having them sent to me at school. presents anddd mail?! who wouldn't love it?
-triple double oreos. an oreo cookie on the bottom, layer of normal oreo cream, another oreo, layer of chocolate cream, finshed with another oreo. at 100 calories per cookie, they are both the most heavenly and most sinful thing i have ever found in the aisles of wegmans.

and thus concludes my super long post of my super long week.
hope you enjoyed it cause now i'm ready for another 4 to 8 hour nap.
goodnight kids.
enjoy your awkward half-fall, half-summer weekend.

in case you hadn't heard

here's a picture of b and i from last summer before he left for boot camp,
[taken by his awesome sister, rachel]
 just to remind you all that he comes home in a month.

a month!!!!
i'm not sure if i've mentioned that before on here or not...
but if you don't care that i get to kiss that adorable face again in just 4 more weeks,
[plus or minus a few days]
 then things are about to get real annoying for you up in here.
i apologize.
except i don't really.

one month guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!


happy birthday bloggy!

and this is why i started blogging a year ago today.
it's why i still blog now.
not regularly and not particularly fabulously, but i do.
and i love it.
it's made me more aware of the beauty all around me.
so there you have it.
happy 1st birthday little bloggy!
here's to many more.

post-edit: this is also my 100th post.
how's that for perfect timing?

my eyelids are shutting themselves

i have like 3 awesome posts planned in my head,
but i don't think i've gotten more than 6 or 7 hours of sleep a night
 since classes started and my brain is mush.
so i'm gonna just go to sleep and pretend that when i wake up in the morning, 
i'll look like this:

.white dresses and boots <3

or this:

when in reality, i'll probably just look like this:
all from here

so goodnight kids.
i'll try to have something coherent to say tomorrow.

the last of summer

from here

what a beautiful saturday.

it started out with sleeping in and being woken up by the sun shining through the blinds.
then some frozen waffles and a few episodes of the office to start the day off right.
a roommate date to run errands and get some groceries,
but by groceries i mean delicious fresh fruit.
nectarines and raspberries and grapes.
now homework outside in the sun and my bon iver pandora station
and then hanging out with my friends tonight.

i'm slowly accepting that summer is coming to an end.
i'm back at school, the days are a little cooler, and the nights require a sweatshirt.
my time is spent reading about Psychology and riding my bike around campus, rather than reading love stories and going for leisurely rides around my neighborhood.
but that's okay.
there's a time for summer and a time for fall.
and this fall b comes home.
so, welcome, autumn.
i'm accepting you with open arms.

not to brag, but i hope everyone is having as good of a weekend as i am.
enjoy the last of summer.

p.s. can i just say that i love my friends?

our union

for your drizzly thursday afternoon:

our union is like this:
you feel cold so I reach for a blanket to cover
our shivering feet.
a hunger comes into your body
so i run to my garden and start digging potatoes.
you ask for a few words of comfort and guidance and
i quickly kneel by your side offering you
a whole book as a gift.
you ache with loneliness one night so muchyou weep, and i say here is a rope, tie it around me,
i will be your companion for life.

the rain

i waited all day.
but i got my rain.
my soothing, healing rain.

from here

it was a nice day.

here i am

a few honest things on this late saturday night early sunday morning:

1) as healthy as the things in picture A are, and as good as they make me feel after a nice long workout, that frozen brownie batter goodness in picture B is the greatest comfort food known to woman.

picture A's healthy, nutritious deliciousness
picture B's fattening chocolatey goodness

2) i miss ben a lot.
i'm a strong, independent woman.
i don't need ben around, but god i want him here.
people ask me how i'm doing all the time, 
[thank god i have people who care]
and i tell them i'm fine, because i am, but truth be told, i miss him so much.
he'll be home soon, but that doesn't mean my heart will hurt any less for this next month and a half.

3) the forecast for tomorrow is rain and thunderstorms all day.
i'm excited for a morning to lay curled up in my bed listening to the rain fall and an afternoon on the couch working on projects and homework with a romantic movie playing.

4) i've been in love with words lately.
there's not much new about that, but especially these past few weeks, i find myself lost in whitman. 
walt whitman and pablo neruda.
 those men and their beautiful words. i can't get enough.

5) then there's this.
i'll leave you with this.

from here

goodnight world.

the one reason i'm okay with summer ending

guess what, kids?

it's september!

guess what that means?!

b comes home NEXT MONTH!!!!!!!!

from here

i'm actually not excited at all.